I think PHP is already "far fewer lines", but just not relative to anything
There are two major complaints about PHP that are true: 1) the versions change a lot and end up causing problems; 2) the naming conventions are sometimes very odd. (For example file() seems like it should be the default but that does weird stuff with line breaks, while file_get_contents() is actually useful.)
I don't really think either of those is particularly easy to solve, even with some sort of phpQuery, or whatever.
Some sort of system-normalizer wouldn't be a bad idea, something that deals with for example magic_quotes and so forth. I don't know how much overall that would accomplish (how much could be accomplished due to security and variation), but as an idea, it's valid.
Something that really surprises me about jQuery is how smoothly it fits into Javascript, and I really don't understand how that works at all. I can't imagine something parallel for PHP really.




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